Have you ever had something go completely wrong and immediately thought, "OH GREAT. NOW WHAT?"
Of course you have and so have I.
Something gets cancelled.
Someone doesn't call back.
A deal doesn't happen.
The opportunity you were counting on disappears.
Your plans get delayed.
And within about 30 seconds, your brain has written, produced and directed an entire disaster movie about what this means for your future.
And naturally, you are the STAR.
But here's something I've learned: Sometimes we take score WAY too soon.
The event itself often isn't what creates most of our suffering. It's the meaning we immediately assign to the event.
Two people can experience almost the exact same thing and walk away with completely different reactions. One sees rejection, the other sees redirection.
One sees failure, the other thinks, "Well, apparently that wasn't my door."
One thinks, "Nothing ever works out for me," and the other thinks, "Interesting. I wonder what this is making room for?"
Same event. Different story. Different emotional experience.
For many years, in my large coaching programs like Peak Performers and Alchemist Inner Circle, I constantly reminded my members that no matter what "cluster mess" they found themselves in, there was one assumption I wanted them to practice:
Everything will always work out for me.
God or the Universe is always looking after me.
Out of this situation, only good will come to me. I am safe.
And I didn't teach that because my own life always went according to plan.
GOOD GRIEF, NO!
I taught it because I had lived it.
Years ago, when I was much younger and working hard to get a foothold in the professional speaking business, I auditioned for a speaking tour; and let me tell you, I sincerely needed that income.
I wanted that job.
I auditioned.
I waited.
And... I didn't get it.
At the time, I was beyond disappointed. It looked like rejection and more importantly, it felt like failure. And if I had taken score right then, I would have absolutely put that experience in the "LOSS COLUMN."
But six months later, I discovered what had happened to the speakers who DID get hired.
They had been seriously mistreated and even worse, had not been paid for months of work. Suddenly my "rejection" looked completely different. I hadn't lost an opportunity. I'd been spared a disaster.
That's when you realize that everything that glitters is definitely NOT gold. And sometimes the thing you're terribly upset about not getting may be the very thing you'll someday be grateful you escaped.
That's why I've become much more careful about taking score too soon.
Maybe the delay protects you from something.
Maybe the rejection redirects you.
Maybe the ending creates room for something better.
Maybe the person who disappeared from your life did you a favor.
Maybe the opportunity that didn't happen wasn't nearly as wonderful as you thought it was.
And maybe — just maybe — something you can't see yet is already lining itself up.
I've lived long enough to look back at situations I once thought were terrible and realize THANK GOD I DIDN'T GET WHAT I THOUGHT I WANTED!
Haven't you?
So instead of immediately asking: "Why is this happening TO me?"
Try asking: "How could this possibly be working FOR me?"
That one question changes your energy. It moves you out of helplessness and back into curiosity.
And here's another little trick I've learned.
The next time something doesn't go according to plan, catch yourself before your brain starts writing the disaster screenplay.
Say: "I don't know what this means yet."
Because you don't. None of us do.
What looks like rejection today may be redirection tomorrow.
What feels like an ending may turn out to be an opening.
What looks like a giant detour may eventually make perfect sense.
You don't have to pretend everything is wonderful. You simply don't have to assume everything is terrible.
That's a HUGE difference.
So this week, before you decide something is bad news, ask yourself: AM I TAKING SCORE TOO SOON?
And remind yourself:
Everything is always working out for me.
Out of this situation, only good will come to me.
I am safe.
Give life a little time to show you the rest of the story.
You may discover that what looked like a disappointment was actually divine protection wearing a very convincing disguise.
Success Really Is an Inside Job,
Lee Milteer
P.S. I have a new podcast called Authentic & Unapologetic, where I go deeper into topics just like this — how we think, the assumptions we make, intuition, personal power, and how our inner world affects the life we create.
You can listen on Spotify or watch me on YouTube at Lee Milteer.
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